“People watch Squid Game and think they’re experts in Korean TV. But I’m the expert. I’ve been watching K-dramas since the beginning of time.”
This tweet from Twitter account @iheartkoreanbabes was until recently believed only to be the obnoxious ramblings of a self-absorbed racial fetishist. However, these words have been proven as fact as just this week art historians uncovered three 15th century paintings from ancient Korea that featured the man.
Turns out this Asian-splaining white guy actually has been an obsessive consumer of South Korean media since its original ancient predecessors in the Korean peninsula entered the Lower Paleolithic period around half a million years ago, a time where stone tools were revolutionary and the concept of preserving inventions and art was born.
The owner of the Twitter account has also provided art historians with a manuscript he preserved that was written around 600 BC by his “Korean besties about our friendship.” Language analysts told us that the writing does in fact describe the immortal man, but roughly translates to: “Why does this guy think we’re friends. He’s creepy and follows us around. He keeps talking about how Asian women are hot and can be nasty in the bedroom. He says he has yellow fever. We don’t even know what that means yet.” An insightful look into the beginnings of written language and international relations in ancient Korea.
@iheartkoreanbabes’s thoughts on contemporary South Korean media and its audience? “Everyone likes it now, it’s so annoying. I liked it first, and I know all the real Korean shows. The good stuff. I bet none of these people have even seen Train to Busan. It’s kind of an underground Korean film, but it’s totally a classic.”
The Wire asked if the owner of @iheartkoreanbabes is, by now, an expert in the language, allowing for easy consumption of South Korean television, but the man told us, “Oh, no, that’s what dub is for.”
Source: Whitman Wire